In Between, Part 19/20
Oct. 16th, 2010 09:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
soulmatejunkeeTitle: In Between, Part 19/20
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
soulmatejunkee
Fandom: Queer as Folk US
Pairing: Brian/Justin
Timeline: What happened between episode 4.09 and 4.10 (POV’s). It starts right after "Eat some fucking chicken soup".
Word Count: 500 words (drabbles)
Summary: I am writing on it since weeks, so I just thought, maybe I should start posting it
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. It’s all CowLip and Showtime.
A/N: Beta byqafkinnetic (Thanks a lot!)
Every comment is welcome. Let me know what you think. Thanks!
I just want to thank everyone for the lovely comments on this story!!
I love reading every single one.
01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10
11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18
Justin's POV
1)
Sometimes something hurts so much that you can’t breathe anymore, it’s like something kills you from the inside. Lovesickness is a good example for that. When it just hits you and it just hurts and you can’t do anything to stop it. Finding out your boyfriend has cancer is also a really good example, but it gets topped by being thrown out because you found out your boyfriend has cancer. It had been almost four weeks so far and I was still pissed. It still hurt and every time I talked to Daphne about it, it came up again.
"Fuck!“
2)
She knew about the cancer, too, of course. But Brian didn’t know she knew and she promised me to not tell him, I knew I could trust her. And I needed someone to talk to. Someone who had nothing to do with it, someone who wasn’t personally involved. And she was my best friend, so of course I wanted to talk to her. She never blamed me for being angry, for being pissed, for being stupid or just for crying.
"I’m sure he learned his lesson“, she said.
"I doubt that.“
"You said he’s trusting you now.“
"Yeah, he is.“
3)
"So everything is going to be okay again. There aren’t so many radiation sessions left, right?“
I looked at her. "It’s not just that. This sucks! It’s horrible to see him like that and not being able to do anything to help him. And I can’t show him that it hurts me, because then he would think it’s pity and he would get angry and probably would throw me out again. So I play it cool.“
"It works.“
I sighed, closed my eyes and leaned my head back to the wall.
"Look, he’s Brian, he’s a fighter, he always was.“
4)
I sighed again.
"It seems to be his nature to fight against everything and everyone, including you. But that doesn’t mean he has to win, right? And I’m sure he knows that it hurts you, he’s just not good in being dependent on someone else. So take it all and then you come home and you can yell at me or throw the pillows through the room or smoke a big fat joint and get high. And the next day, you’ll take it again. It’s not that you’re not getting anything back, isn’t it?“
I laughed. "Yes, fabulous mind-blowing blowjobs.“
5)
"See“, she said and shook her head. "Lord, really?“
"Yes.“ I still laughed. I knew she was right. I knew Brian and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to change his idea of trust and love, especially not so fast. Maybe some day. But right now I had to take what I could get and deal with it. And I got a lot, not just blowjobs. I knew he loved me and needed me and he already admitted that he wanted me to stay. I already got more than I ever expected. I got him.
"I gotta go, Daph.“
TBC
Author:
soulmatejunkee Fandom: Queer as Folk US
Pairing: Brian/Justin
Timeline: What happened between episode 4.09 and 4.10 (POV’s). It starts right after "Eat some fucking chicken soup".
Word Count: 500 words (drabbles)
Summary: I am writing on it since weeks, so I just thought, maybe I should start posting it
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. It’s all CowLip and Showtime.
A/N: Beta by
qafkinnetic (Thanks a lot!)Every comment is welcome. Let me know what you think. Thanks!
I just want to thank everyone for the lovely comments on this story!!
I love reading every single one.
01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10
11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18
Justin's POV
1)
Sometimes something hurts so much that you can’t breathe anymore, it’s like something kills you from the inside. Lovesickness is a good example for that. When it just hits you and it just hurts and you can’t do anything to stop it. Finding out your boyfriend has cancer is also a really good example, but it gets topped by being thrown out because you found out your boyfriend has cancer. It had been almost four weeks so far and I was still pissed. It still hurt and every time I talked to Daphne about it, it came up again.
"Fuck!“
2)
She knew about the cancer, too, of course. But Brian didn’t know she knew and she promised me to not tell him, I knew I could trust her. And I needed someone to talk to. Someone who had nothing to do with it, someone who wasn’t personally involved. And she was my best friend, so of course I wanted to talk to her. She never blamed me for being angry, for being pissed, for being stupid or just for crying.
"I’m sure he learned his lesson“, she said.
"I doubt that.“
"You said he’s trusting you now.“
"Yeah, he is.“
3)
"So everything is going to be okay again. There aren’t so many radiation sessions left, right?“
I looked at her. "It’s not just that. This sucks! It’s horrible to see him like that and not being able to do anything to help him. And I can’t show him that it hurts me, because then he would think it’s pity and he would get angry and probably would throw me out again. So I play it cool.“
"It works.“
I sighed, closed my eyes and leaned my head back to the wall.
"Look, he’s Brian, he’s a fighter, he always was.“
4)
I sighed again.
"It seems to be his nature to fight against everything and everyone, including you. But that doesn’t mean he has to win, right? And I’m sure he knows that it hurts you, he’s just not good in being dependent on someone else. So take it all and then you come home and you can yell at me or throw the pillows through the room or smoke a big fat joint and get high. And the next day, you’ll take it again. It’s not that you’re not getting anything back, isn’t it?“
I laughed. "Yes, fabulous mind-blowing blowjobs.“
5)
"See“, she said and shook her head. "Lord, really?“
"Yes.“ I still laughed. I knew she was right. I knew Brian and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to change his idea of trust and love, especially not so fast. Maybe some day. But right now I had to take what I could get and deal with it. And I got a lot, not just blowjobs. I knew he loved me and needed me and he already admitted that he wanted me to stay. I already got more than I ever expected. I got him.
"I gotta go, Daph.“
TBC
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2010-10-16 09:08 pm (UTC)Sigh!! OMG my heart was always in my mouth, but even apart they were amazing together, it just took 8 fucking epis to get there lol
Later Jx
no subject
on 2010-10-16 09:58 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2010-10-16 10:41 pm (UTC)You can blame Brian if you wish:) But he NEVER broke the rules. & I could care less how old Justin was, they we're his rules. Just be upfront & leave, but to do what he did at Babylon in front of everyone was humiliating (& yes I know BK was fucking Rage, it was his masterplan after all) but I still hated Justin for it & Ethan even more:)
Loved early S3, even though they were apart, you knew that something was just "still there".
Thats why I never watch TV,,so boring & so predictible, lets face it when 308 started (if you were NOT spoiled of course like me) you'd of never of gussed that those 2 would be back together again,,sigh!!! loved the office scene,,Brian Kinney had me at "Taylor" shit will I forever miss it,,now I know you'll comment back as you love Justin blah, blah lol,,but thats OK, as I know whats right & wrong & I even believed Justin thought that.
Hugs & Ill be back asap with the cancer fic,,Jx
no subject
on 2010-10-17 08:35 am (UTC)Nah, not really. I am not a fan of the lying and cheating as well. It's just wrong. No matter if I understand it or not, it's wrong and even though I think Brian was very disrespectful towards Justin and humiliated him more than once in the last 5 episodes... it was still wrong to lie.
And I also don't think it's about Justin's age. Most of time he's more mature than Brian, so that's a stupid argument for cheating and lying. IMO it's about the insecurities and I think it's post-bashing. But I never only blamed one of them. I hated what Brian did and how he act towards Justin after 2.15 - which is a shame because before that S2 was almost perfect.
O and, YES... I do love Justin and I hated to see him so sad and in almost every scene in tears. I don't think he deserved that either. IMO this is not only about Brian being hurt.
no subject
on 2010-10-17 10:11 am (UTC)It did however give us an unforgetable S3, but shit they almost broke my widdle heart, when Brian threw back the bed covers so Justin could climb in, even though he knew he'd lost him sob,sob!!
Off to bed, Ill catch up when I get home, hugs Jx